As you probably know, Donovan McNabb was released yesterday by the Vikings. If you made the mistake of wathcing Eagles football last night, you may have seen Kurt Warner dishing out pump-up advice to McNabb, while clearly implying “you’re not as good as me.” If not, here you go…
“I look forward to watching you uproot turf with a football for half a season to come”? Enjoy.
The Eagles need a game against the Cardinals this week to get back on track. The big-play passing game that used to feature DeSean Jackson on a weekly basis needs to be re-discovered and Arizona is the perfect defense to play, ranking 29th in the league against the pass (272 yards/game allowed). Jackson has been quiet lately with only 8 catches in the last 3 games combined. In fact, he only has 2 TDs all season and has been a non-factor as a punt returner, a big drop-off from his production in 2009 and 2010. Jackson needs to put his contract situation behind him and have a big second half of the season starting on Sunday.
I would normally be really worried about Larry Fitzgerald (considering Earl Bennett and Victor Cruz looked like Pro Bowlers) as he is having another excellent season despite poor QB play. But the Cardinals offensive line is so bad, and backup QB John Skelton should be under intense pressure all game. RB Beanie Wells has been banged up lately but is capable of a big game against the Eagles soft run defense. Wells could become a nonfactor if the Eagles get an early lead as expected.
Surprisingly, Arizona has lost 4 of their 6 games by single digits. They blew leads against the Giants and Ravens but, on the other hand, somehow lost to the Redskins and Seahawks. At 2-6, the Cardinals are a bad team and the Eagles should have no trouble as long as Michael Vick is careful with the ball. The bigger question is what can we take from this game? Probably not very much. There are bigger games ahead, but they will be meaningless if the Eagles don’t take care of the lowly Cardinals. They need to win and hope for losses within the division, as both the Giants (@ SF) and Cowboys (vs. BUF) have tough matchups.
Eagles 35 Cardinals 17
We are past the midway point of the season people! So far my record stands at 19-25-4. Desperation is a stinky cologne, and I might as well have rolled around in a bathtub of it because I reek! Seriously though, it smells like straight up gasoline. Or a diaper full of Indian food. Or a biker vomiting on a pile of dirty shrimp. Or Big Foot’s dick. (Who doesn’t love Achorman? It’s un-American to not love that movie.)
This week, I’ve decided to try something new – just write about each of the games. That’s right, no gimmicks. I’m going to shoot from the hip, call them like I see them, and just generally go for the gold. No more tomfoolery, ballyhoo, or shenanigans. I’m going to give 110%, take it to the limit, and live like I was dying.
If you haven’t been able to tell already, today’s theme is “CLICHE”. I’m very excited. I’m also unsure how to put the little accent over the “e” in “cliche”. Here we go!
ATL @ IND (Pick: ATL – 6) – Cliche: Many hands make light work - Atlanta has a lot of offensive weapons. Thanks to the bye week, Atlanta has all of its receivers healthy, and Michael Turner is going to literally trample several Colts players who get in his way. I was tempted to use a cliche like “there’s no place like home” for this pick and go with the Colts, especially since Atlanta is normally terrible away from the Georgia Dome. But I couldn’t do that – because the Colts are terrible and shouldn’t be within 10 points of any NFL team at this point.
TB @ NO (Pick: TB + 9) – Cliche: Better the Devil you know, than the Devil you don’t - Tampa Bay knows New Orleans, and this game will be close. New Orleans rush defense is so bad, that even if it were theoretically possible to give 150% they would still get run all over by Legarette Blount. Josh Freeman knows this secondary as well; Tampa is going to keep pace and might even pull of a W, so if I were you I might consider a small bet on the money line (+370)
MIA @ KC (Pick: KC -4) – Cliche: Every dog has its day - Unless that dog is Miami that is. Miami will continue to keep pace with Indianapolis in their heated race to draft Andrew Luck. Also, the Dolphins are still reeling from their beloved mascot being stolen. FINKLE is EINHORN, EINHORN is FINKLE! (Not loving Ace Ventura, Pet Detective is also un-American.)
SF @ WAS (Pick: WAS +5) – Cliche: The best thing since sliced bread – The Niners coach, Jim Harbaugh, is NOT the best thing since sliced bread. He’s a coach of a team that usually underachieved their talent level in the past and this year is playing above it. The Niners have been strong this year coming and playing teams in the East, beating both the Bengals and Eagles. But, it’s Daylight Savings time now, and stuff just GOT REAL. I’m thinking the clock change confuses the Niners just enough for the Redskins to win this one.
DEN @ OAK (Pick: OAK -7) – Cliche: Sticks and stones will break my bones, but words will never hurt me – Tim Tebow has endured a lot of criticism this year. And he has deserved all of it. Look, I’m not debating how nice he is or his Christian values; those are both things I like. But he can’t read a defense, doesn’t go through his progressions well, and his throwing mechanics are laughable. His long-armed motion delivers inaccurate and slow passes, and also helps lead to him getting sacked. I don’t think Oakland is all that good (particularly since McFadden will be out) but I also have a policy to bet against Tebow in place now. Unless its a bet on who will miraculously produce bread and fish to feed everyone in the stadium, Then I’ll probably go Tebow. (Too much?)
CHI @ PHI (Pick: PHI -6.5) – Cliche: Jay Cutler sucks – It’s not a very common cliche, unless you’re from Denver or Chicago, but it’s one I strongly believe in. The Birds are going to come out hyped for Monday Night Football.
If it seems like the Eagles play the Bears more than any other non-division opponent recently, it’s because they have. The teams have faced off each of the last four years, with all four decided by single digits. It’s mostly been rough for the Eagles though, going just 1-3 against Chicago since the 2007. This will be a good barometer to see which team is a legitimate playoff contender, as the Bears are 4-3 and fighting with the Lions for a wild card spot. The Eagles need to show that the destruction of Dallas last week was no fluke, and begin inching closer to the Giants for the division lead.
The key to stopping the Bears on offense is Matt Forte. In his 4th season from Tulane, Forte has taken his game to another level and has become one of the best backs in the league. Forte already has 1091 yards from scrimmage in only 7 games, mainly because he is just as dangerous as a receiver as he is a runner. The Bears like to use Forte in the screen game and that is where he racks up big chunks of yardage, averaging 5-6 catches per game in addition to his carries. Chicago’s wide receivers don’t pose much of a threat, and Jay Cutler is erratic as it is. As long as the Eagles can contain Forte, they should be able to keep Chicago’s offense in check.
This Bears defense is just a shell of the one that carried Rex Grossman to the Super Bowl in 2006. They are still led by Brian Urlacher and Lance Briggs, but the Eagles can move the ball on this defense if they don’t turn the ball over. Chicago is well-known for playing a Cover 2 defense with two deep safeties, trying not to allow any big plays down the field. This should leave the middle of the field wide open for Vick to pick them apart, much like he did against the Cowboys as Brent Celek had a great game. Also, the Bears are struggling to stop the run, giving up an average of 5.2 yards per attempt, tied for 2nd worst in the league.
The Eagles still have next to no margin for error if they have any hope for the playoffs. The Bears are not as talented as the Eagles, but they can stay in this game by forcing turnovers and playing excellent special teams led by Devin Hester. It’s crucial for the Eagles to get an early lead and let LeSean McCoy take over from there.
Eagles 27 Bears 17
Key Matchup: Todd Herremans vs. Julius Peppers. Herremans has had a great season at RT, but Peppers is one of the only DEs athletic enough to contain Michael Vick
So this week I’m continuing the tradition of writing my column a few minutes before the start of the 1 PM games – why do you ask? Two reasons – I performed a lot better last week just picking games really quickly with a minimum of thought and because I’m becoming addicted to brunch and went again this week. What do eggs benedict and cocaine have in common? I’m addicted to both of them. Just kidding. About the eggs benedict.
This week we’re going to relate the games we’re picking to horror movies – because it’s nearly Halloween and my picks have been horrifying all year anyhow! After last week I am 17-22-3, but just like I say every other week – I feel a comeback coming! Do you still believe me? Probably not – and away we go!
JAC @ HOU (Pick: JAC +10) – Horror movie: I know what you did last summer – Why is this game patterned after I know what you did last summer? I’ll tell you why – that movie stinks, and this game is going to stink. And unlike the movie, this game won’t have a young Jennifer Love Hewitt to look at and take your mind off how bad it is. You know, we all liked her because of her acting.
NO @ STL (Pick: NO – 14) Horror movie: Saw – Drew Brees has a diabolical plan to pick apart the crappy Saint Louis secondary. Also, Sam Bradford was handcuffed to a radiator (or whatever that dude was hancuffed to in the movie) by the Rams owner and has to saw off his arm; that way the Rams can pick Andrew Luck next April with no one going, “What about Bradford?”
MIA @ NYG (Pick: NYG -10) Horror movie: Paranormal Activity – I never saw Paranormal Activity – which makes it just like this game, because I’m not going to watch it.
DET @ DEN (Pick: DET -3) Horror movie: Scream – this is going to be an entertaining thrill ride of a game. For Tim Tebow. Because the Detroit defense will attempt to kill him over and over. And (spoiler alert on a 10+ year old movie coming) there’s going to be two killers – Suh and Vanden Bosch.
NE @ PITT (Pick: NE -3) – Horror movie: Night of the Living Dead – Did you know that the zombie genre has many of its beginnings in the Pittsburgh area? George A Romero – arguably the greatest director of the genre, went to Carnegie Mellon and filmed Night Of the Living Dead in the area. The Steelers, as a homage to the great director, play like mindless zombies every time the Patriots come to town. Seriously though, Brady owns the Steelers.
DAL @ PHI (Pick: PHI -3) – Horror movie: Casper – What’s that? You’re saying Casper the friendly ghost isn’t a horror movie? Well, I’m sorry – the prospect of the Eagles losing is scary enough on its own. Besides, who doesn’t like Bill Pullman? He’s the President in Independence Day and he’s in SpaceBalls – how he doesn’t have an Oscar on his mantle is beyond me.
This is the kind of game that could turn the season around for either of these teams. The Eagles and Cowboys have both been underachieving this year, with the Eagles at 2-4 just behind the Cowboys at 3-3. For the Eagles, we will see if they are going to make a run to win the NFC East and make the playoffs, or finally crumble under the pressure from all the fans and media. If they fall to 2-5 with losses to the Giants and Cowboys already, the season would realistically be over barring something miraculous.
The key to this game will be establishing the running game early with LeSean McCoy. The Cowboys have the top ranked rushing defense in the NFL and if they force the Eagles to abandon the run, Vick could be darting from the pocket earlier than he wants with DeMarcus Ware on the other side. Hopefully getting Jason Peters back from injury will help, but slowing down Ware is no easy task, as he already has 8 sacks this season. Vick also will need to recognize defensive coordinator Rob Ryan’s complex blitz schemes. He will definitely try to keep Vick guessing by bringing different players from all over the field. As they did in Washington, the short passing game should help to neutralize this, as well as another strong effort from McCoy (28 car 126 yds 1 TD last week) and the offensive line.
On defense, the game plan needs to revolve around stopping Jason Witten, as it always does. Nnamdi Asomugha and Asante Samuel should be able to slow Dez Bryant and Miles Austin on the outside. But who covers Witten? The Eagles linebackers don’t really have the size or speed to stay with him. Do they put Dominique Rodgers-Cromartie on Witten and risk not having enough bulk in the front seven to stop rookie DeMarco Murray? That is the big question.
Andy Reid is 12-0 in his career after the bye week, so given an extra week to prepare he should be able to put together a game plan that will exploit Dallas’ weaknesses. However, the Eagles have lost their last 5 home games (including playoffs) dating back to last December against Minnesota, a trend they need to turn around starting Sunday. Given Tony Romo’s propensity to throw games away at the end combined with a rejuvenated Eagles team desperate to dig out of a 1-4 hole, I like the Birds to make a statement on Sunday Night.
Eagles 27 Cowboys 23
With all this World Series madness along with the Eagles bye week last week, our boys in green haven’t been as widely discussed as they probably should. They aren’t on the front pages of newspapers, Castillo still has his job, and other than the Asante-Andy bad blood, there isn’t a ton of hype around the team right now. Granted, none of us expected a 2-4 team by this point. But there is hope.
The Eagles are 2-4 with the Cowboys on deck. The Skins have shown their true colors by now, and the Giants have a series of tough match-ups in the upcoming weeks in the Patriots, Niners, Eagles, Saints and Packers. This is the game the Eagles need to win. It’s a divisional game against the team that could give the Birds the most trouble now and also down the road in week 16. This is the game to get up for. Andy’s got a pretty decent record after the bye week – 12-0 decent. But something that has me worried this week is a thing that has me worried every week – Andy’s challenge flag.
Andy Reid’s challenge flag is the Tony-Romo-two-minute-drill of the Eagles. It just stinks. The only difference: Tony will try to blow the game late for his Cowboys, but Andy will attempt that all game long.
It’s not easy watching plays like this go unchallenged, while time after time a red flag will find its way in the field for a play which is almost never overturned – a ball spot. Refs are petty like that. They almost always leave they play as stands. How dare you question my eyesight! But that’s just Andy’s style. It’s always been, and we’ve accepted him (somewhat) in spite of it.
Whether you’re an Andy Reid supporter or not, you know his history when it comes to this.
So…
Join the movement.
Together we all can win. We are the fans, we buy tickets, we watch them on tv, and we buy their merchandise. Without us there is no organization. We are the 99%.
Let’s find Andy a coach’s challenger adviser.
#OCCUPYANDYSFLAG
Fresh off his Moneyball stardom and back in action as the affable Andy Dwyer in Parks and Recreation, Chris Pratt showed us last night that he can do more than impersonate just one Major Leaguer.
Maybe it’s just me, but the busted nose combined with the hair slicked back and goatee stubble just screamed Aaron Rowand. Or maybe it was due to the World Series game a few channels away, and I’m somehow still stuck in my post 2011 season Phillies depression mode. Either is plausible. Anyway, it’s fun to look back at athletes that once made us all proud to be Philadelphians. Go sports.
Sorry guys – I don’t have a lot of time this week. I have to go to brunch, so this week the picks column is going to be relatively short. I can’t even really focus on writing it because my mind is already thinking of eggs benedict drowned in hollandaise sauce. Maybe a Denver omelet. Maybe some french toast. The possibilities are endless, and seemingly so is my appetitie right now.
The one thing I don’t seem to be hungry for – picking winners. Last week’s dismal 1-4-1 record I blame on the Japanese, because they’re an easy scapegoat when I put my picks down in haiku form. The record so far this year is now 14-20-2, and for those of you who are currently homeless, I’ll try to see if I can grab a doggie bag at brunch. Just let me know what street corner you currently call home. Here come the picks:
ATL @ DET (Pick: DET -4) – You know who else is hungry? The Lions head coach – he’s hungry for revenge damn it! This week I would not want to be the team facing the Lions, and I definitely wouldn’t want to be the Falcons head coach going in for a handshake at the end of the game.
KC @ OAK (Pick: KC +6) – Carson Palmer’s first start for Oakland – there’s going to be some kinks to figure out. Also, the ghost of Al Davis will not be able to help on the final play this week – he and the Rat Pack are playing in a flag football league.
PITT @ ARI (Pick: PITT -4) – I’ve never been right about Pittsburgh this year, and that has to stop some time doesn’t it?
GB @ MINN (Pick: GB -10) – Green Bay will eventually have a Wilt Chamberlain-esque performance and score 100 points in a game. It’s just a matter of time.
CHI @ TB (Pick: CHI +1.5) – Note, this game is actually taking place in London. Which now makes me want bangers and mash as well at brunch.
SEA @ CLE (Pick: CLE -3) – Seattle sucks.
Ronnie Brown was a highly touted runningback coming out of Auburn in the 2005 draft. After splitting carries with Cadillac-cac-cac-cac-cac (sorry, MGK was just on) there, he was drafted second overall by the Dolphins in ’05. In Miami he continued to do what he does best – split carries. For years he and Ricky Williams shared the spotlight, whatever spotlight there was. Ronnie never emerged as the clear number one back, which is how the Eagles were able to sign him for a 1/100th of Michael Vick’s deal this offseason.
The Dream Team was now complete.
Fast forward 6 weeks. Vince Young’s only appearance was, um, not great. Babin is third in the league in sacks but creates train-sized holes in the running game, DRC at times doesn’t even seem motivated now that he’s been relegated to essentially a Nickel Defense guy, and Ronnie Brown? Well, who could forget this horrifying display of intellect.
So are we glad Jerome Harrison didn’t pass his physical and allows for Ronnie Brown to remain a member of the Dreamin’ Team? Signs point to no.
Harrison wasn’t much for the Eagles back in 2010, but there wasn’t really any expectation. Trading Brown could have been the first step towards stripping that ridiculous VY title off the Birds this year. A title no team fairs well with.
